Road Trips

There are some pretty big changes coming up in the Loftus house this week, namely, that it's going to be empty!

Tomorrow morning, Joel and his friends Mark and Gianluigi will be driving to Colorado where all three of them will have to complete Initial Flight Screening. They are planning on taking two days to make the 20-hour drive, and then they will in-process on Monday, February 28. Please keep them in your prayers.

For those of you not well-versed in Air Force lingo, IFS is a mandatory program prior to the start of pilot training. It usually takes four weeks to complete, meaning Joel is anticipating being there from March 1 - April 1. IFS is intended to "weed out" those who will not be able to cut it as pilots before the Air Force has invested a lot of time and money in them. In other words, it's intense, and it's a big deal. Also, IFS is an "unaccompanied" TDY, meaning that spouses are not allowed to tag along, or even visit for a weekend.

Calvin and I will be taking a road trip of our own while Joel is away. Originally, I had been planning on flying home for a week while Joel is in Colorado. Then, my school situation changed and the opportunity to go to PA for the whole month presented itself. Joel and I deliberated and prayed about this option for quite a while. Ultimately, we concluded that this opportunity is a really special blessing. God is allowing me to spend time with my family to ease the loneliness of being away from Joel.

Anyway, Calvin and I will be departing Tuesday, March 1 to drive North to my grandparent's home in Kentucky - about a 7 hour drive. I'll spend a few days there visiting my extended family, including my 103 year old great-grandmother! Next, I'll head East for approximately 11 hours to visit the little Lofti in Maryland. Finally, I'll head an hour North to Pennsylvania to see my incredible parents and brother. Also on the agenda are a visit to West Chester and a possible trip to Carlo's Bakery. (AKA Cake Boss!) So, there's your update. Hopefully, I'll be seeing many of you soon!

Laboring in Vain

Proverbs 19:21 - "Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand."

I'm a planner. I have a schedule in my mind, and when things don't go according to that plan, I usually don't take it very well. Joel is much more spontaneous and spur of the moment than I am; he loves to say, "Go big or go home." And I'm fine with that... as long as it's on the calendar. (We can "go big" on Monday between 11 and 4.) I'm opposed to last minute plans just because they are last minute... even if I can't think of a good reason NOT to go somewhere or do something, I'm extremely hesitant to do anything that I don't already have written in my mental day planner. I love to schedule. Perhaps that's because it's a form of control; I like to have a say in what's going on and when it's going on. I'm not very good at letting go and trusting that the Lord's purpose will prevail. Therefore, God has put the Air Force in my life.

Update: Joel just got moved up one class in pilot training. As of Tuesday, he is in class 12-09, not 12-10. All that essentially means is that he will start pilot training in April instead of May, and then will complete UPT one month earlier. It does not affect his IFS dates: March 1- April 1. He will still be leaving next Saturday to drive to Colorado with two other LT's. That's what him being moved up OFFICIALLY means. But I was honestly pretty upset when we found out, because to me it means the trip home for Easter that we had planned (and made the mistake of telling our families - including all the little Lofti who desperately miss their big brother - about) now has to be cancelled. It means that the romantic weekend we were planning for the weekend before Easter is out the window, too. Because, you see, we are not allowed to take leave within 10 days of when Joel starts pilot training. It also means that instead of having a relaxing month to enjoy together between the separation mandated by IFS and the beginning of the stress caused by UPT, we will have a week. It means that all the plans I had tediously made for our last month of freedom, are ruined. And then this occurred to me:

Psalm 127:1 - "Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain..."

I made plans, created expectations, and got my hopes up over things I had not yet committed to the Lord in prayer. I had my mind made up on how our lives would go, and for that matter, SHOULD go for the month of April. I've been laboring in vain.

So, now what? Well, I'm praying that I will learn to walk JOYFULLY by faith, and not resent it when I can't walk by sight. It's scary though. Pilot training scares me. I cried to Joel Tuesday night, "I don't want you to start pilot training! I don't want you to work 12 hour days and then be preoccupied and have to study when you get home! I want you to have time for me!" As soon as I said it, I knew how childish I sounded. But there it is: there is the selfishness of my heart. So, I'm praying that while I learn to walk by faith, I will also learn not to worry about things I can't control.

Luke 12:22 & 24-31 - "And Jesus said to his disciples, 'Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat, nor about your body, what you will put on...Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds! And which of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? If then, you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest? Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith! And do not seek what you are to drink, nor be worried. For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them. Instead, seek his kingdom, and these things will be added to you."

Making plans without consulting God and worrying about things that are 100% beyond my control are both huge wastes of time, and I don't recommend them. Maybe you should consider what you're laboring in vain over today.

Valentine's Day: A time to die

In the summer of 2009, I had the incredible opportunity to be the youth intern at my home church – Cornerstone PCA. Part of what that entailed was leading (alongside our wonderful youth director) a week-long mission trip for 7th and 8th graders to Washington DC. In one of our preparation meetings for this trip, our team was brainstorming about what our theme for the week could be, a motto we could use to encourage each other and remind one another why we were there. We came across this verse:

“For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.” – Philippians 1:21

One of the students suggested our motto be “It’s time to die!” We joked about it at first, but then realized what a powerful phrase that really is – “time to die.” Die to self. Die to selfishness. Die to pride.

Throughout the week in DC, we would remind each other that it was time to die when we were out of our comfort zones making conversations with the homeless, or when we were up at the crack of dawn to serve breakfast at a less-than-pristine shelter, or when we were waiting in line at 5 AM to shower in the cockroach infested bathroom we were sharing with twenty other girls.

Yesterday, for the first time in over a year, I thought about our motto from that mission trip. It was while Joel and I were listening to a talk by Julie Lowe called “One Anothering.” She quoted this passage:

“Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.”– Ephesians 5:1-2

She talked about what being an imitator of Christ would look like in a marriage, and one thing really stuck out to me: Imitating Christ means when I am sinned against, what comes out of me will be a fragrant offering, not a bitter, angry stench. Then, she said that imitating Christ in my marriage means dying to myself… I guess it’s time to die again!

Joel and I have been married eight months now, and honestly, I feel like we are just now getting to the honeymoon stage. Being married has been really hard, really challenging, and really stressful. We are just beginning to learn that marriage can also be really joyful and sanctifying. In our marriage, nothing brings me greater joy than dying – to my selfishness, of course. It can be in the little things: leaving peas out of a recipe (even though I love peas) because Joel hates them; the mid-size things: offering to go home for Easter instead of taking a romantic cruise because otherwise Joel won’t see his family again until November; or even the really big things: moving all over the place, spending a lot of time apart, and just overall supporting him in this crazy Air Force thing.

So, happy Valentine’s Day! Show your spouse how much you love them… How can you die today?

Welcome!

I've been wanting to start blogging for a few months now, but for this reason or that I kept talking myself out of it. Anyway, here it is at last. My hope is that this will be a convenient way for our families back in Pennsylvania and Maryland and our friends all over the U.S. to keep up with what's going on in our lives. My plan is to update you on our general activities now that we are in Mississippi and, specifically, on Joel's progress through pilot training.

So, here's your first update! Joel is just over two weeks from leaving for IFS (Initial Flight Screening) in Colorado, where he'll be for four weeks. He's excited and a little nervous at the same time - it's scary to think that everything he's been dreaming of and counting on for years could all fall through, but we are trusting God to protect him and help him at IFS. And I know he will do just fine. I can't wait to be married to a pilot. :)

My school situation is, unfortunately, up in the air. I've applied to three online universities and am prayerfully waiting to hear back from them. I am also waiting and praying for a job! I've put in about a dozen applications around Columbus, but no luck yet.

In other news, it SNOWED in Mississippi... I wasn't too excited about it, but everyone down here thinks it's a big deal so I'm attempting enthusiasm. It's a little funny to me to see how much everyone panics when it snows in MS; at least Joel didn't have to go in to work til 9:30!